Marriage Enemy #1: Lethargy

 In Marriage, Relationships

Marriage Enemy #1: Lethargy

We asked a marriage counselor friend of ours about why a marriage fails. We were expecting a long complex answer so we already had a bottle of wine open. Yet her answer was short. According to her, if there are no addictions or mental illness involved, then most marriages fail through simple, straight-forward laziness.

Almost any couple can be taught the skills to make their relationship work, but unfortunately, a lot of spouses, just aren’t prepared to put in the effort. How true this is!

Saving an ailing marriage, or building a healthy one takes both skill and will. Regrettably, most people believe that romantic love should be effortless. They remember the ease with which their relationship blossomed when they first fell in love and assume that that is how it will be forever after.

In truth, falling in love wasn’t effortless – most of us pour enormous amounts of time and energy into it, of course, when disillusionment makes an appearance in a marriage, the couple who expects an easy ride will be easily overwhelmed.

Falling in love takes effort. Staying in love takes effort.

Like anything else of value in life, marital happiness doesn’t come without some investment on our part. The good news is, the more we put in, the more fun marriage becomes.

Francine & Byron Pirola
Francine & Byron Pirola are the authors SmartLoving Series and the founders of the Stick Kit. They have worked with thousands of couples in several countries over the past 20 years. They have been married since 1988 and have five children.
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