Sexual Differences… a resource for loving

 In Marriage

Most of us are mystified to some extent by the other sex. We find their preferences baffling and their behaviour annoying. What seems so logical and sensible to one is completely bewildering to the other.

Whether the differences are as inane and which way to hang the toilet paper roll, too many of us spend our energies trying to change the other when it isn’t necessary and doesn’t work anyway. And then we resign ourselves to perpetually frustrated tolerance – a joyless resignation to what seems hopelessly unreformable.

Yet, these sexual differences are what make marital relationships and family life so rich.

Our sexual differences complement each other –  not only do they stimulate the initial attraction, they also strengthen our bond by fostering mutual inter-dependency. Each of us brings a unique contribution to the union. This uniqueness helps us to develop gratitude and appreciation for the other. It fosters a sense of being a team –  we each rely on the other to provide a certain service or value that would otherwise be absent.

Perhaps he is an awesome cook and she loves to garden. There’s an obvious delegation of responsibilities that can keep everyone happy there. And while everyone expresses their masculinity or femininity uniquely, there’s a host of  differences that when approached as complementary, can make what was baffling and annoying into a relationship asset.

For Better or Worse? Don’t let your differences intimidate you. Focus on finding the positive side to your differences and they will bless your marriage rather than erode it.

Francine & Byron Pirola
Francine & Byron Pirola are the authors SmartLoving Series and the founders of the Stick Kit. They have worked with thousands of couples in several countries over the past 20 years. They have been married since 1988 and have five children.
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